2024 marks the 50th Jubilee of the Permanent Diaconate here in the Archdiocese of Denver. Through preaching, service, worship and prayer, deacons serve the people of God in unique ways through their various ministries and lives. This article is one of a series of articles the Denver Catholic will publish in 2024 which will feature local deacons and/or a diaconal ministry. There are many Deacon Saints who were martyred for their faith. In this year of Jubilee, the deacons of the Archdiocese of Denver are asking for prayers through the intercession of Saint Euplius of Cantania, deacon and martyr. Learn more about this Deacon Saint here.
The quiet, humble witness of faithful grandparents started Deacon Tim Unger on his path to faith and, later, to the diaconate.
His great-grandmother would quietly sit in the corner of the living room each morning, praying her rosary before the day’s activities began in earnest.
His grandfather would often take his siblings and him fishing and playing, except on Sundays, when the family simply spent the day together.
“I remember it was always profound to me that this was such an important thing, and it meant so much to him,” Deacon Unger shared.
As he grew in his faith, he found himself feeling called to more, though he didn’t know what he was being called to. Things continued vacillating for a while until God started making moves in Deacon Unger’s life.
“I give the Lord credit now, as I look back,” he said, reflecting on his providential move from California to Colorado. “I think it’s largely because God was pulling me away from all these comfort things that I knew. I didn’t know a soul out here, and I had such great friendships, which I still do, and an active social life. But I think that was interfering with my discernment, and I was allowing that to be my life. When I came here, it was quiet. I started hiking in the mountains and things, and I got this moment of clarity and knew that I was being called to something.”
Convinced of a call to greater service, Deacon Unger entered the seminary for the Archdiocese of Denver.
“I knew that it was the right place for discernment. At the time, I didn’t know if I was supposed to be a priest, but I knew it was the road I had to cross, and that was one of the big moments of my life, and it was profound,” he shared.
After one-and-a-half years in seminary, Deacon Unger discerned that he was not called to the priesthood but rather to marriage and family. Yet, even still, Deacon Unger kept searching for years. His wife would often comment on his search, saying that she could feel it, that he continued to search for something more.
“I had this great joy at being a husband and father, but God has called me to a dual role, and I was trying to figure that out,” Deacon Unger said of his discernment of the diaconate. For him, his dual vocation became clear thanks to his wife.
Having discerned and begun formation for the diaconate, Deacon Unger and his wife were at St. John Vianney Seminary for a deacon formation weekend. With two young children at the time and weekly travels for work, formation was by no means an easy or convenient commitment. During that formation weekend, Deacon Unger walked into Christ the King Chapel and found his wife sobbing.
“I said right then to her and to God, ‘We can’t do this anymore. I can’t do this to you,'” he shared, tears in his eyes.
Little did he know his wife was crying after a powerful moment in prayer to Our Lady. While praying the Rosary, she heard Mary tell her, “Let him go to my Son.”
“And that was the confirmation of where I was,” Deacon Unger said. “It’s through my wife, through my bride, through this great vocation of marriage. From that day on, I knew that I was called to be both a husband and a deacon.”
Since then, Deacon Unger has been assigned to Risen Christ Parish in Denver and, after a providential invitation, has served as a deacon formator for six years. Now the director of the St. Francis School of Theology for Deacons, he oversees the formation of future permanent deacons through his own witness, like his grandparents did for him.
“It’s probably the one thing that keeps me awake at night,” he said of his new responsibilities for future vocations. “I love these men. It is absolutely powerful to watch men, their wives and their families change. It’s humbling to see when they truly come to realize they have been called and realize that we spend our lives trying to figure out what God wants of us.
“When I say it keeps me awake at night, it’s because it requires a lot more prayer. I would like to think I know what I’m doing, but I need to know that God is still directing and he has my back. I don’t want to take them away from Christ; I want to bring them closer,” he continued.
Year after year, Deacon Unger does just that with the help of his formation team: he leads the permanent diaconate candidates, their wives and their families closer to Christ the servant, whom the deacons are to embody.
“We are Jesus Christ the Servant,” Deacon Unger said, reflecting on the role of the deacon in the Church, especially in the liturgy. “The priest is Jesus Christ, and in the time of the Mass, we are serving Christ. There’s an image the people are supposed to see of Christ the Servant, Christ himself, even in the minor tasks that we’re doing at the altar. But it’s powerful and it’s more of a bigger image of what the Church sees with the diaconate. What we’re supposed to be imaging for the people is service sacramentalized through ordination.”
In short, the deacon embodies Christ’s humble service. Through his ordination, that service is formalized and blessed with the manifold graces of the sacrament of Holy Orders. More than a simple volunteer, the deacon is to represent Jesus, who came to serve rather than to be served.
Our deacons make great sacrifices to embody that servant Christ, taking years of their lives to study, pray and discern before ordination, then spending years afterward in dedicated service to our communities. How can we, the Church, support them – and others – in this vital vocation?
“Tell your deacon you see him, you appreciate him. And not just the deacon but his wife and his family who are in your community as well. The sacrifice that they make is immeasurable,” Deacon Unger said. “Pray for them, too. Everything always starts with prayer.
“The other part, when it comes to vocations, lies in the power of just saying, ‘I see something in you,’” he continued, reflecting on the importance of inviting others to consider what the Lord is calling them to. “In my life, it resonates. People said they saw something in me. I think that we are all called to help plant that seed to build the Kingdom, and I think that it’s so important.”
For anyone discerning their vocation, striving to learn where the Lord was calling them, Deacon Unger had simple words of wisdom.
“Don’t be afraid. There are a million reasons to say no. But the one reason to say yes is Christ calling you. Are you feeling something? That’s the one reason to just take the next step and say, ‘I’m here because of you right now, for this moment,’” he concluded.
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Supported by the Archbishop’s Catholic Appeal, the St. Francis School of Theology for the Diaconate forms men, their wives and their families to be generous servants of the Church, living the Gospel and bringing others to come to know Jesus. To help support the formation of these men, consider donating to the Appeal here.
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